I’ve woken up for the past 2 days with a serious panic attack. The kind that takes your breath away. The kind that can literally make you sick. Nothing is going as planned. Its all happening really fast. I register for my classes at the art institute on Tuesday. I am now feeling intimidated by the school’s prestigious reputation. Suddenly questioning myself and my worth in an artistic way. Worried that I’ll get burnt out of ideas. Luckily my brother talked me through it last night. I waited for Marty to leave before I completely melted. I can imagine he’s even more afraid of everything than I am. I’ve moved before, I’ve started over somewhere new…he hasn’t. This is ALL new to him. And I try to stay as strong and confident as possible when we’re together. I know together we can conquer the world, but it doesn’t make it less scary.
Thinking “In a few weeks it will all be over and we’ll be there” has a 15 second turnaround rate of relief. It’s officially crunch time. Packing begins tomorrow. We hope to have everything that we don’t need everyday packed by the weekend.
The month of December is going to be insane. Sad, exciting, stressful, crazy…I’m nervous. I just have to remember to breathe through it all.
breathe. breathe. breathe.